I saw this trailer the other day. Again, something that I discovered via my personal Facebook newsfeed. Sometimes Facebook works well when it decides to show me things I AM actually interested in. And in this case, it’s this particular trailer for a documentary; Embrace.
The trailer starts off with Taryn saying some negative things about her body. Or rather what she used to think of her body. Miss 11 was in the room with me when this was playing and she was actually shocked at the words Taryn used to describe her body. She thought it was ridiculous to think that way. I nodded. She was right. But do you know what the sad thing was? She didn’t know her own mother had such dark thoughts about her own body. She couldn’t know because I didn’t want her or her siblings to start thinking of their bodies negatively. Non of my kids have ever heard the negative words I say about my body because I keep it in my head. They say actions speak louder than words, which is why I’ve always tried my best not to show how the different changes in my body has actually affected me. It’s always behind the closed doors of my bathroom. My kids see this confident woman – I know so because I’ve accidentally once, let it slip that I faked my confidence and they were shocked. Of course I turned it around and told them I was kidding and was just testing them. Truth was, I wasn’t.
Before I go on, I’d like you to stop and think, use ONE word to describe your body. What word comes up? I won’t share mine because they are so negative it’s sad. I’m not obese nor am I unhealthy in any way. I haven’t got the body of a supermodel either. I am just me. Yet, I have struggled with my own body image for years. I tend to focus on the flaws and never on what’s actually good about my body. It was just never good enough, or when it was I always tend to become obsessed with keeping it that way and go into a turmoil when I start to “relax” on my routine. Thankfully I’ve never had an issue with food at all. I do love my food and I’ve always gone by the mantra of eating in moderation. I guess for me it’s the fact that I have never been able to accept the changes my body was undergoing through the different stages of my life.
Have I accepted the changes yet? Maybe. Well, I’m trying to. Funny how Mr. C has never once complained about the changes to my body, and yet I’ve continuously found something negative, each time, every time. I can’t and don’t blame the media. I blame myself for these horrendous thoughts. While yes, the media often portrays super slim or super fit bodies that are often unattainable, I’ve never ever wanted what isn’t unattainable. I’ve never in my life wanted to have a body like this or that person, I just wanted to be perfect in my own eyes. Silly I know. And I am trying to change that mindset.
I’m glad that Taryn is making a documentary on trying to change the way we, think of our body – men and women. The aim of the Body Image Movement is for us to encourage women to be more accepting of who they are by using positive language towards themselves AND others and prioritise health before beauty. Something I think a lot of women struggle with. The documentary is still being made, and I can’t wait for the release.
Tell me, do you often find yourself thinking negatively about your body? Will you start making a change? Will you promise yourself to say something positive each time you look at yourself in the mirror?